“Yes. Since I met him, I found peace and happiness in my life again. I never felt like this before and I don’t want to lose him ever again…” Kame confessed while his gaze dropped to his hands.
Ryo chuckled at Kame’s adorable sight and ruffled through his hair.
“I see. So it’s really time to let go….”
“Huh? What do you mean?” Kame asked confused but Ryo just laughed and patted Kame’s head.
“Nothing. Don’t wreck your head over it. I’m just happy that you found the special someone in your life. I missed that bright smile of yours.” Even though his own heart hurt saying those words to Kame, he knew that it was the right thing to do. He had to let go and leave Kame to Jin.
“Alright, your stupid boyfriend woke me up. I’m gonna crash again next to Uchi. Wake us up when we reach Korea,” he winked and walked off.
“G-good night Ryo,” Kame called after his friend wondering what this had been all about.
Hesitantly he rose to his feet and paced outside spotting his boyfriend sitting on the floor. Elegantly like a cat he approached him and kneeled down next to him.
“How dare you just leave me all by myself. I felt so lonely for the last half hour.” Kame pulled an adorable pout.
“Besides, it makes me wonder what makes you chose Ryo’s company over mine. I’m a little bit offended by that~”
Jin smiled, quickly throwing the rest of his cigarette over the railing. “You liar, bet you weren’t awake for half an hour.”
Jin pulled his hands into the pockets of his hoodie.
“I didn’t chose Ryo’s company voluntarily. He followed me so we had a chat.”
He changed the topic, “Did you have a good rest?”
“What if I was awake for the last half hour, freezing and crying because my baby just left me all by myself?” Kame continued mocking, gently reaching for his boyfriend’s hands to embrace it with his own.
“A - chat? With your fists?” he chuckled, “Yes, I was able to recharge my engines though I was seriously worried when I woke up and you weren’t there. It’s chilly outside!” Kame caringly brushed over Jin’s cheek.
“If you would’ve missed me for half an hour already, why didn’t you come to look for me earlier?” Jin mocked back.
“I really didn’t hit Ryo. We actually had a real conversation, like humans.” Jin let out a short, sarcastic laugh. “Well, mostly. And don’t worry so much, I just needed some fresh air. I won’t freeze anything off.”
Jin had to chuckle to himself, remembering that even Ryo had been ‘worried’.
He slowly pulled his fingers out of Kame’s warm hands, wanting to hide the shaking that was obviously too intense to be just caused by the windy night air, carefully to make it appear as if they were just cold and he wanted to get them back into the warmth of his pockets instead of just out of Kame’s reach.
“Ah, we should probably go back in then, hm?” Jin said with a strong, firm voice for further cover.
Kame knew where the shaking came from and he disliked the fact that Jin was trying to cover it. The monk had been right. Jin was still running away from his problem - so it was time to show his boyfriend that he wouldn’t get far with this attitude.
Determinedly and with a bit more strength Kame embraced Jin’s hands and drew them closer to him again trying to lock eyes with his boyfriend.
“Why are you trying to hide it from me? You can’t fool me, I know where the shaking comes from! Why are you still embarrassed to show your weak side in front of me?”
When Jin was still not returning his gaze Kame let go with one hand to grab his boyfriend’s chin with his thumb and index finger to finally meet his dark eyes.
“Look at me! Don’t you dare turn your head or I’ll eat you!” Kame talked to Jin like he would scold a puppy.
Jin pulled his face out of Kame’s hands, trying to do the same with his own hands but since Kame was using more strength, he didn’t want to obviously rip them out of Kame’s reach.
A dark chuckle left his throat. “Do you think I would mind if you try to eat me? Go ahead, I’m all yours.”
“Jin…” Kame’s voice dropped a tone and it was obvious that he wasn’t joking anymore.
Again he fetched his boyfriend’s chin and forced him to hold the eye contact.
“If you won’t look or be honest with yourself about this, I won’t sleep with you ever again! That includes cuddling, hand jobs and blowing as well! If you don’t believe it, try me!” he threatened.
“Oh, c’mon. Don’t be childish about that. You will never manage to pull through with that.”
This time Jin didn’t turn his face out of Kame’s grip but he didn’t exactly look at Kame either, trying to keep himself occupied with talking and mimicking, just not holding still to avoid the awkward moment of silence where they would stare at each other and Kame would start to be able to read him and he would be vulnerable and Kame would see straight through him.
“You try to make it look like I’m the only one that’s needy here but you need it as much as I do, you were the one who came and jumped me in the first place and you can’t resist me anyway. You couldn’t resist me when I was just there and I didn’t do anything back then and I didn’t even try to seduce you, I have actually never tried to seduce you so far so do you really think you could resist me IF I would put my effort into it when you weren’t even able to resist me while doing nothing and I didn’t even do anything wrong this time, I was just sitting here and having everything under control because I promised and I never wanted to do anything, just get fresh air and collect myself, take a deep breath~”
Kame’s eyes narrowed. That arrogant bitch of a boyfriend was really challenging him here. Bitchy, he crossed his arms in front of his chest looking at Jin skeptically.
“…and you expect me to believe that? You aren’t even able to hold eye contact with me! Oh, for your information, I just jumped you because you were the only decent guy at that time. It’s not like you were irresistible…or even ’that’ good in bed so you should keep it low Mister!” Kame was aware that he was acting like a total bitch right now but that’s what Jin got for mocking him like that!
Jin’s eyes narrowed and he glared at Kame. Suddenly he didn’t have a problem anymore looking at Kame and holding eye contact. The anger had made the insecurities and weakness fade into the background.
“Satisfied?” He hissed, probably more hurt than really angry but it was easier to show his emotions that way.
“So I was just ’there’, huh? So you would be dating just ‘anyone’ now who had crossed your sight if I wouldn’t have been there?!”
Kame hold the intense eye contact without blinking once.
“Finally…why do I always have to piss you off in order to see your real, strong self? Idiot! Of course I wouldn’t just take anyone. You were special right from the beginning.” He pecked his boyfriend’s lips hoping to soothe the situation.
“I…I just don’t like it if you keep things from me. I love you. I’d never judge you.” He nudged his nose against Jin’s cheek.
“…stop glaring at me, you scare me!”
Jin leaned back against the wall, sulking a bit but indeed feeling more powered up from the adrenaline of the small ‘fight’.
“I promise, I’ve been a good boy,” Jin grumbled, voice slightly annoyed, annoyed because the whole issue was tiring him slowly and he didn’t like going in circles and he didn’t like it that this whole shit was taking up so much of their time and energy he could use somewhere else.
He was sick of Kame worrying about him and even more pissed about the constant fights they were having because of it.
Jin pulled another cigarette out of Ryo’s pack and placed it between his tensed lips.
Without asking, Kame climbed on his boyfriend’s lap and straddled him and stole the other’s cigarette. Skilled, he lightened it and inhaled the smoke before he gently placed it back between his lover’s lips.
“You are never being a good boy. You ravish me with your mere presence.” He smiled widely. Kame didn’t want them to fight more about that issue either.
Maybe all he could do was trust Jin and silently watch over and be there for him.
Jin’s body was still slightly shivering and Kame wrapped his arm protectively around his boyfriend’s chest and cuddled closer, rubbing his warm body against Jin’s.
“Just pretend I’m your blanket but don’t forget to carry me inside after you’re done smoking!”
“Silly, you’re thin like a blanket and need to be kept warm more than I do.” Jin pulled one arm around Kame to press him against his chest.
He didn’t say how much he liked it actually to hold tight onto the warm body but he felt like the spreading body warmth made something in himself open up a bit and let things happen.
Jin threw the unfinished cigarette away, spreading his legs a bit to trap Kame in between and be able to feel him even closer. One hand buried into Kame’s hair to pull his head against his neck, unbelievably close and the other just tightened around Kame’s shoulder as if he wanted to squish the younger.
And for a moment, face pressed against Kame’s shoulder, he let it just happen, let the trembling of his muscles shake his body and let the pain he felt inside be without fighting it behind a mask.
“I’ll be ok in a minute.”
Jin’s voice felt like breaking but he didn’t need to speak, he just needed to stay like this for a moment.
Kame didn’t say anything, just gently stroked through his boyfriend’s hair to gesture him that he was there and that he wouldn’t go anywhere.
Feeling Jin trembling in his embrace hurt him but on the other hand, he was relieved that his boyfriend was finally opening up to him.
Soothingly he kissed Jin’s head, continuing to careless his boyfriend’s back and snuggled his cheek against the other’s hair.
“Every minute I spend with you makes me fall deeper in love with you. Jin, you are stronger than you might think. Believe in yourself! I’m here, I won’t ever leave you again.”
“I’m getting myself out of this. I messed it up. I’ll fix it.” Jin loosened his tight grip around Kame to look at him, tugging some strands of hair behind Kame’s ear.
“Soon I’ll be back to how I used to be before, you’ll see.”
He couldn’t deny that he still felt a bit uncomfortable with Kame encouraging him. He just didn’t want Kame to ‘need’ to encourage him. He still had to fight with his pride and issues to show weakness.
Jin leaned forward to give Kame a kiss.
“I am strong, just my body has to get the memo first,” Jin smirked self confident with a bit of self-assurance.
“That’s my baby~” Kame chuckled and leaned forward to steal another kiss from his boyfriend licking his lips hungrily.
“I don’t doubt that you’ll be your old self soon again. I’ll keep you occupied and maybe your body will remember the real good drugs by tasting them more often…” he whispered in a hoarse voice.
“If I got your message right, I’m the one who enjoys riding you the most after all so I’ll have to go for one when we reach Korea to keep my reputation, right?” he winked seductively playing with Jin’s fingers on top of that.
A triumphant smirk appeared on Jin’s lips. “See, you can’t resist me after all.”
He squeezed Kame’s butt teasingly. “If I remember correctly, we still have a score to settle and I’m willing to keep the battle going to keep us occupied.”
Jin playfully brushed his fingertips over Kame’s backbone down to the rim of his pants just to slightly tease the beginning of the crack between Kame’s ass-cheeks.
“You’re the only drug I will never quit. When you were gone, I needed a compensation but now that I have you back. I don’t need it anymore.”
Kame teasingly let his head fall back and opened his mouth to release a lustful moan at Jin’s slight touch.
“Oh you are so going to lose! There is no way that you’ll win against me!” he bit his boyfriend’s chin trailing his tongue up to the other’s ear.
“I can’t resist you, huh? It’s not like you are able to keep your hands off my body longer than a minute,” he shot back slowly rising to his feet though.
“Let’s lay down for a few more hours. We still have to take the train after the ferry and we need energy for your new plan!” he grinned dirtily.
Jin stood up as well, following the other inside. He needed some hours of sleep. He hadn’t gotten any since 5am but he still was afraid of falling asleep. Too many times he was still woken up by nightmares.
Jin pushed the thought aside sitting down next to Kame to pull him with him when he was laying down making the younger half sprawl over his body.
“There’s no way you can win over me. I’ll catch you in situations you’ll never expect it.”
...to be continued.
KOREA WE'RE GOING IN!